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Don’t agree to everything

How often do you negotiate with people regarding anything? I always struggled with negotiation and I would get easily convinced effortlessly. I still don’t know how much good I’m with negotiation but creating a pitch so that both the parties are satisfied and benefit from something is a very niche point you need to achieve in any conversation.

Since my school life, I was the most shy and bright student who would attend all the lectures but teachers would not take note of my existence in the classroom. I hated that part of my life, I had no advantage in my social skills and lagged based on communication. If anyone had told me to deliver a speech in front of a group I would have fainted. I still get a bit of anxiety socializing with people but I think it's manageable 😅. So, for me, my negotiation skills were just non-existent 😑.

For a successful negotiation, you need the particular things:

  1. Confidence in whatever you speak

  2. Making the opposite party understand their benefit

  3. Getting your side straight with no misunderstandings

  4. Making the opposition party believe whatever you are saying is the only viable option (That’s in the case of persuasion)

So, now when your next deal or figuring out your salary with the interviewer remember these things before you start putting your points forward.

What I do when I need to get things done my way is that firstly, talk about how it's gonna benefit the opposite party. Place your wants and then again add another layer of their goodie. It should be like a burger🍔. The bun being their side of the talk and the patty being your wants. It's like your words need to be hidden between their agreement. This thing works most of the time.

Use words like “and” rather than using “but”. Now particularly some people persuade what they want them to convince. Genuinely speaking persuasion is such a hassle because it's like convincing against the will. Now, this is a technique that sales personnel use to improve their sales records. Me being an aspiring sales student I want to learn this to upsell products. But I’m currently struggling with negotiation so that’s the first step to achieve.

Not everyone is good at communication but at some point in time you need to learn how to make the best of your social skills. This reminds me of how I started to improve my social skills. So during my school days, I was hesitant to ask a question so when I entered my Jr. college I made a pact with myself “No matter how awkward I was I need to ask a question in a class or any event🙋‍♂️” So I kept on doing this for several months and overcame my anxiety to start a conversation. But, asking questions was tough “I would usually get thoughts like is this a smart enough question? Will everyone laugh at me? But you know what no one really cares, maybe they would have not even heard you, and that gives you the liberty to make mistakes in your vocabulary.

So remember one thing negotiation is still an effective skill you need to learn and if you can’t then learn it from your mom when she bargains with the shopkeeper.

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